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See also: Wedding Etiquette
Congratuations!
You're Engaged!
Let's get started planning . . .
First, the Diamond.
The 4 C's of Diamonds
A diamond's value is judged by four main characteristics: Carat, Clarity, Color and Cut.
Cut
A diamond that is masterfully
cut displays maximum brilliance and fire. Cut and proportion are extremely important because they have the greatest influence
on the sparkle and value of a stone. A diamond that is well cut reflects light from one facet to another and disperses it
back through the top of the stone.
Color
A diamond's
body color can range from totally colorless to light yellow. The whiter or more colorless the stone, the more costly, because
the absence of color is more rare. Also, the less color in the stone, the easier it is for light to pass through and be dispersed
back into the spectrum of colors, like a rainbow.
Clarity
Nature is rarely perfect. So it is very rare to find a diamond that is completely pure or free of
inclusions - minerals or crystals trapped within the stone at the time it was formed. Without ten-power magnification, you
may never see these tiny inclusions. But they are the fingerprint that makes each diamond unique.
Carat Weight
The size of a diamond
is defined by its weight, which is expressed in carats. One carat weighs one-fifth of a gram, and is divided into 100 points
- like pennies to a dollar. The larger the diamond the more rare and costly it is. However, depending on their color, clarity
and cut, two diamonds of the same carat weight can vary widely in their value.
Diamond Shapes
ROUND
| The full-cut round diamond represents the highest advances in
diamond cutting, maximizing fire and brilliance. When in doubt, the round is always a smart choice. |
OVAL
| The oval is an elliptical shape that is based on the brilliant cut. Because it creates the illusion
of length, it is a popular style for a woman with a small hand or short fingers. |
MARQUISE
| A variation on the brilliant cut, the marquise is an elongated shape with pointed ends. Its shape is flattering to
the small hand, making it appear longer. |
PEAR
| The teardrop-shaped pear makes
a beautiful ring. Its cut is a cross between a brilliant and marquise, and is also well-suited to the woman with a petite
hand or short fingers. |
HEART
| The heart-shaped diamond is the most romantic of diamond shapes. It is like a pear shape, but
with a cleft at the top. The cutter's skill comes into play in creating a stone with an even shape and a well-defined
outline. |
EMERALD
| The emerald shape is a rectangle with corner facets and broad, flat planes. It is given a step
cut creating rows or steps of elongated facets. When selecting an emerald-cut diamond, good clarity and color are essential
- in fact, you will rarely see one in lower grades. That is because inclusions and body color are much more obvious in this
shape. |
PRINCESS
| Square-shaped with many sparkling facets, the princess cut is one of the newest choices for the
diamond engagement ring. It especially enhances the hand with long, elegant fingers. |
BAGUETTE - SIDE OR ACCENT STONE
| Baguettes are smaller, rectangular-shaped stones with only a few steps. Baguettes most
closely resemble an emerald cut in a much smaller scale. They come in straight and tapered shapes and make attractive accent
stones.
Source: http://www.shaneco.com/jewelry/how_to_buy_a_diamond.asp |
Your Wedding/Event Budget Worksheet My Total Budget ___________ | Expenses | % of total budget | Your estimate | What you actually spent | Ceremony
Location fee, officiant fee, marriage license,
musician's fees, ring pillows | 3% | ______ | ______ | Reception
Reception Site, Food, Drinks, Rentals, Cake, Favors | 48% | ______ | ______ | Attire
Dress, Headpiece/veil, undergarments and hosiery,
shoes, accessories, jewelry, hair and makeup, Groom's Tuxedo or Suit, shoes, bow tie, cuff links, studs, suspenders | 10% | ______ | ______ | Rings
His and her rings, engraving | 3% | ______ | ______ | Flowers
Ceremony, bride's bouquet, maid-of-honor and
bridesmaid bouquets, corsages and boutonnieres, centerpieces, flower-girl basket | 8% | ______ | ______ | Music
Ceremony Musicians, Band and/or DJ, cocktail hour
musicians, sound system rental | 8% | ______ | ______ | Photography
Photographer and Videographer's fees, albums, additional prints, disposable cameras for candids | 12% | ______ | ______ | Transportation
Transportation for wedding party, guest shuttle and/or parking attendants | 2% | ______ | ______ | Stationery
Invitations, response cards, thank you notes, postage,
calligraphy, guest book | 3% | ______ | ______ | Gifts
Bridesmaid and groomsmen, parents, welcome baskets for out-of-town guests. | 3% | ______ | ______ |
10 Ways to Make
Your Groom Feel Special
Order a Groom’s cake, but make it really unique to him
– a police car for an officer, a Dalmatian dog for a firefighter, animals for a veterinarian,
medical equipment for a doctor, etc . . . Make him feel a part of the planning by integrating some of HIS hobbies into the event.Get him a special gift – a large, blown up photo of
his bride to be! What the picture will consist of is up to you – sweet or saucy…..Do something unique with the “garter” –
use his favorite scent or put a special treat in the garter for him to find – maybe something that is a joke between
the two of you.Pick
some part of the reception or ceremony and ask him to “surprise you” with his own idea. Let him design it and
put his ideas into play! You may be surprised!Send a gift to his hotel room the night before your wedding or to him the morning after his
bachelor party. Write
a special “toast” to him to read during the reception – he’ll be overcome when you say all of those
sweet, or maybe goofy, things! Many men enjoy “fan fare foods” – surprise him with some special appetizers that he would love
– Buffalo wings, mini corn dogs, etc . . . or even a fun childhood favorite dessert – like a cotton candy machine at the reception! You could even have
his own very special dinner served to him in lieu of the regular menu option. Can we say – BBQ Ribs!! (Don’t forget
the bib!) Send
his parents or his mother flowers and a card thanking them for bringing him into this world to be your soul mate. Send him a love note just moments before
the ceremony.
The Bride's Many Chores . . .
9 -
12 Months before the WeddingSelect a wedding planner to help avoid wasting time or money. Begin thinking about the type of wedding. (Formal, informal,
seated, buffet, afternoon or evening, etc.) Throw an engagement party for friends and family to announce marriage plans. Confirm ceremony date, time, and site with Officiant. Set a preliminary budget. Set the date. Select attendants. Reserve the reception site. Select and book caterers, photographers, videographer, florists, musicians, and other
service providers. Begin
compiling guest list. Select wedding dress, headpiece, and bridesmaid dresses. Start thinking about the honeymoon.
6 -
9 Months BeforeAttend premarital classes. Choose and order wedding dress accessories. Order the wedding cake. Register for china, gifts, etc. Shop for a new home or apartment.
6
Months BeforePlace
deposits and sign contracts for wedding services. Choose bridesmaid dresses and accessories. Choose flower girl dress. If traveling, make sure visas and passports are up to date. Complete honeymoon plans with groom. Discuss rehearsal dinner with groom.
4 Months BeforeVerify that the wedding gown, bridesmaid dresses, and flower girl dress have been ordered. Make sure addresses for guest list are up to date. Order invitations, announcements, and any other personal
stationary. Choose
and order formal wear for groom and attendants. Make sure all out-of-town male attendants have submitted their measurements to formal
wear provider. Verify
that both mothers have selected and ordered their dresses. Investigate requirements for medical test and other records for the marriage license. Design a map to direct guests to the ceremony and reception
sites. Complete
registering. Shop
for trousseau.
2 Months BeforeSchedule final fitting. Finalize bridal registry. Confirm ceremony details with the officiant. Finish addressing invitations and announcements. Finalize wardrobe for showers, pre-wedding parties, and honeymoon. Shop for gifts for bridal party. Shop for accessories, such as shoes, stockings, garter, purse,
cake knife, candles, and guest registration book. Choose wedding rings and arrange for sizing and engraving. Plan the bridesmaid party, luncheon, or tea. Provide them
with a list of responsibilities and expectations on the day of the wedding. Schedule an appointment with the hairdresser and makeup consultant. Finalize and verify all details with service providers directly
or through the wedding planner.
6 Weeks Before Mail invitations. Confirm all attendants have been fitted for formalwear. Set rehearsal and communicate time, date, and place to appropriate
parties. Make
final menu decisions. Discuss wedding photo shots with photographer and videographer. Send announcement to newspaper. Attend the Bridal Shower. Write thank you notes for gifts. Select readings and special passages for ceremony.
2 Weeks Before Pick up wedding gown and confirm its fit and condition. Take care of blood and medical tests, and marriage license
requirements. Finalize
musical selections for the ceremony and reception. Finalize seating chart for reception. Print reception place cards. Provide caterer with final head count. Finalize timeline with the wedding planner for the day of the wedding. Finish addressing announcements to mail on the wedding day. Attend the Bachelorette get-together. Prepare gift baskets or special notes of thanks to be delivered
to selected guests' rooms. Break in wedding shoes by wearing them around home. Write toasts for wedding reception and rehearsal dinner.
1 Week BeforePick up wedding rings. Give final guest count for the reception to the caterer. Practice applying make-up for the wedding day, if doing on
own. Confirm
details with all service providers. Verify all bridesmaids and groomsmen have picked up their formalwear. Confirm that all attendants know when to arrive at the rehearsal,
rehearsal dinner, and wedding ceremony. Confirm honeymoon plans. Make a list of names and pronunciations for the best man to mention in his introduction,
if appropriate. Cancel
newspaper and mail for while your client is away. Pay upcoming bills that will be due while your client is away. Pack honeymoon and purchase traveler's checks. Arrange to move belongings to new home.
1 - 2 Days BeforeReview any special seating arrangements with ushers. Groom to pick up formalwear. Make sure marriage license is in hand. Check all final details with caterer, florist, musicians, etc. Manicure, pedicure, and spa as you like. Confirm transportation. Arrange for the wedding planner to receive an envelope of
tips and fees for distribution to clergy and vendors.
NOTE: Your personal timeline will differ from this - this is
an example of what will be expected.
For your Personal Timeline, please contact our office at 630-855-4725
or by email.
So . . . What's HIS job now?
Buy an engagement ring. Draw
up a wedding guest list and have your family make theirs. Select the engagement ring – although
now-a-days brides may also be involved in choosing the engagement ring. - Choosing his wedding party: best man, groomsmen and ushers
- Choosing the attire for the groom’s wedding party – in keeping with the style of the
wedding
- Selecting thank-you gifts for his
wedding party
- Arranging – and paying
for – lodging for his wedding party
- Selecting
a gift for the bride
- Compiling the groom’s
part of the guest list and making sure that his parents provide their guest list.
- Planning the honeymoon – Today, this, is more of a joint venture
- Choosing wedding bands together
- Arranging for and purchasing the marriage license
- Making arrangements for transportation from the ceremony to the reception site, if necessary
- Choose and invite your best man and ushers for the
wedding.
- Choosing his wedding party:
best man, groomsmen and ushers
- Choosing the
attire for the groom’s wedding party – in keeping with the style of the wedding
- Selecting thank-you gifts for his wedding party
- Arranging – and paying for – lodging for his wedding party
- Selecting a gift for the bride
- Compiling
the groom’s part of the guest list and making sure that his parents provide their guest list.
- Planning the honeymoon – Today, this, is more of a joint
venture
- Make insurance provisions for your
new status.
Notify your attendants of the time and place of rehearsal. Standing in
the receiving line, if there is one, or - with the bride – being sure to greet all the guests at the reception
Making toasts and responding to toasts at the rehearsal dinner
and the reception
Those crazy traditions??
or not . . .
Something
Old, Something New,
Something Borrowed, and Something Blue
Something Old
| Continuity
| Something New
| Optimism and Hope
| Something
Borrowed | Happiness
shared from happily married couple
| Something Blue
| Fidelity, Love, Purity, Fertility
| Lucky
Sixpence for Her Shoe
| Ensures a Life of Fortune
|
Source: the Wedding Planning Institute.
Who's Responsibility is it?
Maid/Matron
of Honor
· Responsible for own gown, shoes and accessories. · Attends all events in a timely fashion, including photograph sessions. · Helps select bridesmaid dresses. · Arranges and helps pay for bridal shower and bachelorette party. · Maintains a record of gifts received. · May help with decorations and party favors. · Helps coordinate the bridal attire. · Holds the groom's ring. · Holds bridal bouquet during ceremony. · Arranges bridal train before vows. · Acts
as witness, signs official document. · Hands
out rice, confetti, etc. to be thrown at the bride and groom after the ceremony. · Pays for own travel and hotel expenses.
Bridesmaids
· Responsible for own gown, shoes and
accessories. · Attends all events in a timely fashion,
including photograph sessions. · Helps arrange
and pay for bridal shower and bachelorette party. · Assumes
maid of honor duties in her absence. · Assists
in decorations and party favors. · Decorates
the car. · Helps maid of honor hand out rice, confetti,
etc. · Runs last-minute errands. · Pays for own travel and hotel expenses.
Junior Bridesmaid
•
Wears a dress similar to that of a bridesmaid, but in a simpler style.
• Participates in the processional
(recessional participation is optional).
Flower Girl
· Is usually between the ages of five and eight. · Responsible for own gown, shoes and accessories. · Carries a basket of posies, tiny nosegay, or a basket of loose rose petals to strew in the bride's path.
Ring Bearer
· Responsible for own attire, shoes, and
accessories. · Assist in handing out programs. · Walks down the aisle carrying a satin pillow with the ring (or stand-in) attached. · May walk with the flower girl or after her.
Candlelighter
• In some parts of the country, candlelighters participate
in the wedding. Usually two boys, 9 to 14 years old, walk forward to light the candles at the altar just before the bride's
mother is seated. (Children should attend rehearsal to practice their parts, although they do not normally attend any pre-wedding
parties. After walking down the aisle, they might quietly slip into their parents' pew to avoid disrupting the ceremony
with fidgeting. They need not participate in the recessional.)
Best
Man · Responsible for own attire, shoes and accessories. · Attends all events in a timely fashion, including photography sessions. · Gives the itinerary to the groomsmen and ushers. · Oversees ushers. · Arranges and helps pay for the bachelor party. · Holds the rings, license and travel tickets. · Gives prearranged payment to the officiant/clergy. · Plans for transportation to and from the ceremony. · Toasts the bride and groom at the reception. · Returns the grooms suit/tuxedo to the bridal shop.
Groomsmen/Ushers
· Responsible for own attire, shoes, and accessories. · Attends all events in a timely fashion, including photography sessions. · Helps plan and pay for the bachelor party. · Assumes the duties of greeting and seating the guests. Seats
guests at the church as they arrive -- offers his right arm to each woman. Asks if they are friends of the bride or groom
and seats them accordingly. Bride's guests are seated to the left, the groom's to the right; order is reversed in
Jewish services. When one side has many more guests than the other, the usher may begin seating guests on the side with fewer
people. · Hands
out programs. · Unrolls the aisle-runner before the
attendant's walk down the aisle. · Decorates the car.
Parents
Mother of the Bride
- Usually acts as hostess of the reception
- Helps the bride compile the guest list, arrange details of ceremony and reception, and may help her select her wedding
outfit and trousseau.
- Keeps
the bride's father and groom's parents informed about wedding plans.
- Is afforded special honor at the wedding service and is seated last, just
a few minutes before the wedding begins.
- Greets guests at head of reception line.
- Sits in place of honor at parents' table.
- Makes sure guests are having a good time and is on hand to bid them goodbye.
Father of the Bride
- Rides to the ceremony with the
bride.
- Escorts the bride
down the aisle, then joins his wife in the front row.
- As official host of the reception, he mingles with guests (he may or may not join in the
receiving line).
- Keeps
an eye on the bar and champagne supply.
- Makes a short toast at the reception.
- Is the last person to leave the reception, and says goodbye to guests.
- Traditionally paid for the majority of the wedding. It is now appropriate
for other financial arrangements to be made.
Parents of the Groom - The first wedding tip to be followed by the groom's parents is to initiate contact and communication with the
bride's family. Introducing themselves to the bride's parents is the groom's parents' first and foremost responsibility.
- Host and
pay for the wedding rehearsal dinner. The event should not necessarily be costly.
- Participate in the planning stage of the wedding.
However, the role is usually limited to merely providing a timely, appropriate and accurate guest list.
- The father of the groom is charged
with escorting the mother of the groom, and that role is still conditional if they are in good relations -- that is, they
are not divorced.
- The groom's mother should complement the gowns to be worn by the bride's mother and bridesmaids, not try
to outdo them.
- The
groom's parents are expected to heed customs and traditions during wedding ceremonies. They would be led by ushers to
where they should be seated in the wedding venue.
- The groom's parents are sometimes involved simply in funding or bearing wedding-related
bills. Among the other expenses the groom's parents traditionally pay for are the bride's wedding ring, the clergy
fees in the church, transportation expenses of the groomsmen, gifts or tokens for groomsmen as well as lodging costs if necessary,
gifts for the bride and the bouquets, boutonnieres and corsages.
Who Pays for What?The
Groom | Wedding ring for the bride | Wedding gift for bride | The marriage license | Gifts for the best man, groomsmen, and ushers | Fee for the officiant | Gloves, ties, or ascots for the men in the wedding party | Personal physical examination | The honeymoon | Bride
and bridesmaids' bouquets |
|
| The Bride | Wedding ring for the groom | Wedding gift for the groom | Accommodations
for her out-of-town attendants | Personal
physical examination | Gifts for the bridal
attendants |
|
| The Groom's
Family | Wedding gift for the couple | Travel expenses, hotel bills | Wedding attire | The
Attendants | Rehearsal Dinner
|
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| The Bride's Family | Invitations,
announcements, and mailing costs | Bride's
wedding attire | Ceremony, including
rental of sanctuary, fees for organist, soloist, choir, and/or sexton, aisle carpets and/or canopy, and any other additional
costs for decorations | Engagement
and wedding photographs and video | Transportation
for bridal party to the wedding ceremony and from the ceremony to reception | The bridesmaids' luncheon | The reception, including food, wedding cake, beverages, gratuities for the bartenders
and waiters, decorations, music, flowers | Wedding
gift for the newlyweds |
Source: The Wedding planning Institute.
You've made it! Now what?
After the Honeymoon (Call
1-800-772-1213 or visit www.ssa.gov) and appropriate agencies
and companies (driver's license,
utilities, etc.) Preserve the wedding flowers. Preserve the bridal gown. Send thank you notes and/or gifts to guests.
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